This week has flown by. I intended on doing blog posts all week, but here I am. AnyWho…
I took a crazy long nap on Tuesday mid day while listening to the Bible. I woke up with my phone ringing. That was the last day I took a nap. I have taken a nap almost every day for over the last year I would say. I really understand the power of emotional energy. I have been pretty protective of my emotional energy store this week.
My intention has been to give myself a month to get to my new situation and to be pretty gentle on myself. Lots of prayer, lots of meditation, lots of quiet low vibration. Lots of fires in the fireplace and lots of burning incense.
I received a phone call from my 10th-grader on Thursday night. She was clearly afraid and in tears. Her dad started an ugly fight with her after trashing her dreams. Of course, I was bombarded with texts all night after that explaining why this altercation was all her fault. I didn’t read them and I certainly didn’t respond to them. After a lot of prayer the following morning I had a conversation with him. True to form, we was trying to put all of our little family on the same side as far as needing better communication skills. Further, he and said 10th-grader needed to figure out a way to make sure this kind of thing didn’t happen again. Screeeech…wh-whatttt?! Back the truck up. Woahhh. If you think you’re going to sit there and tell me any of this was her responsibility, this conversation is over. This was not her fault. This was your fault. You are verbally and emotionally abusive.
On a positive note, she and I have had a very peaceful calm weekend. We saw Race; we cooked; we took Neville on very long walks while exploring our neighborhood; we went to Mass; we had great conversations; we laughed; we shopped for Sweet 16 decorations.
I love her. She inspires me. She is such a truly beautiful soul. When I think of my life and the lack of direction, lack of support, lack of protection I experienced…well, I won’t allow that to be her truth. I trust God. Each time I start to wander in my mind beyond the limits of this 24-hour block, I think of God and I know He is already there and I don’t have to worry. I know that worrying is simply me trying to take back control of my own life and I don’t want to do that. My best thinking got me here. Now, my best thinking keeps me in God’s capable, loving hands. Thy Will be done. Every.day.