Are we obliged to carry on relationships with people simply because we possess the same blood? I have thought, fought & prayed over this a lot. My answer is always a solid “no”.
I’m just stating the facts. I “stalk” him on FB to see that he is alive, to see the state of his mind, to see him. He’s my brother. I love him. I miss him. I guess I miss the way he used to be. But maybe he wasn’t so different even back then. Maybe I was just naive to his problems. Either way, I miss the light in his face, the unabashed love he had for life, the way he threw caution out the dang window…he taught me to drive a 5-speed in 5 o’clock traffic & then how to shoot whiskey, all in the same evening and in that order!
But now, he’s not that person. He said things to suit the moment. Only to suit the moment. Lies, I guess. Sigh. I just couldn’t take anymore. It was offensive, the bullshit he concocted.
And one day I realized, if a stranger was telling me this, I would walk away. But he wasn’t a stranger. He’s my brother. I’m not very proud of him anymore. But I do realize ad believe he will go straight to Heaven, when his time here is complete.
And I do hope he knows how much, how very much, I love and adore him.