Monthly Archives: February 2012

Emptying the coconut…

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every once in awhile i must ramble…emptying the coconut, i call it – my mom used to call me and my 5 brothers & sisters’ heads coconuts.  i know i bombed the grammar there…forgive me.

anywho.

i ran 10 this morning & rode my bike 23 yesterday plus a basic 2.8 mile loop.  i realized that my bucket-list goal of doing a full iron man when i’m 50 doesn’t have to wait that long.  i’m 45 next year.  you feel me?  see where i’m going with that?  45 is a spectacular year for an iron man.  truth be told, i need to focus on swimming this year.  that just seems like light years away and i have a pool in my backyard.  the water is still too cold and i’m just too busy to go to the healthclub.  i guess that’s code for “it’s not important enough at this moment to top my list of priorities.”  that’s the real deal.  but the idea is out there.  it’s on a burner – front or back i’m not sure.

my sweet girl – she’ll be part of the back stage crew for the musical beginning tomorrow.  her sister is part of that crew, too.  so, after track yesterday afternoon, older sister had her way-cool black t-shirt with “staff” and “backstage crew” emblazoned on it in no-nonsense white letters.  “where’s yours, sweet pea?”  “oh, well, since i haven’t been able to go to music, i didn’t get one – i think they ordered them.  it’s okay, mom, i’ll just wear a black shirt.”  😦  No, NO, you will NOT just wear a black shirt, i thought to myself.  the real story is, she has articulation therapy during music.  so, she hasn’t been participating, but i could not bear the thought of that sweet little girl not having a shirt like everyone!  so, Bell’s, one of the best sporting goods store in our city, put the appropriate letters on a shirt WHILE I WAITED!  and they were very sweet about it.  i mean, no one did anything wrong here, i just couldn’t bear her being born deaf being yet another reason for something else not working out like everyone else.  i’m so excited to give her this shirt!  it’s in my car and i’m going to give it to her after track practice today.  she’ll be thrilled.

i splurged on my favorite vitamins today.  $40-something bucks.  for a month’s supply.  they are like giant sweet tarts. i love those things.  and FULL of good stuff.  i try to alternate my multi vitamins with something less costly, but equally nutritional.  Source of Life Gold, i think they are.  YUM.

meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy, corn & peas are on tap for tonight.  my house smells divine!  i don’t usually buy corn either – monsanto????  eeewww.  no thank you.  but i bought some today – non-gmo, organic, good stuff.  oh, and no bpa lining the can.  the stuff that excites us….

gotta go make snacks for when i pick up my sweet peas from practice…

peace.

how’s Lent going, by the way???  if you fall, just get back up.  don’t scrap it all.  God loves us all – imperfections and all…that’s the truth.

wow.

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Okay, the kids are out of school all week.  The two youngest are even out on Monday!  So, we went to Houston for a quick-who-knows-what kind of trip.  I can’t hold it in any longer.  I smell GREAT!  My husband has amazing taste.  He truly does.  We were in Prada (his suggestion:) and while I wasn’t about to accept his offer for a new purse, I was really excited about the perfume I smelled.  Hubs is one of those types that derives happiness from seeing other people happy.  He knows women love to shop.  He loves buying things for the people he loves.  He’s pretty awesome.  I’m keeping him.  🙂

We woke up today and instead of having a known-to-be fabulous great breakie at the St. Regis, we went to some other place.  Then, instead of driving home like I thought we would, we went back to the galleria & shopped more.

Okay, I digress.  Yesterday, which was Friday, we were sitting down to eat seafood (Lent, people!) at the Oceanaire in the Galleria.  Up walks Mrs. shall-be-nameless, but she teaches my daughters, and in particular, my littlest angel-daughter.  You feel me on this?  In a city of a ga-jillion, up walks the lady who, I believe, has it in for my kid!  And we are not even in our own home town!  Okay, not IN for my kid, but she’s not about to expand her horizons and say, “how can I help?” But I have to say, for the last week, I have felt Mary’s beautiful attention on the issue – I feel Her pushing me away from dwelling on the situation and letting Her do what must be done.  When I think of said teacher, I pray for her.  I really do.  I just want her heart to open up so she can see what a gift she has in front of her…and hopefully, go the extra way to help.  Quit pointing fingers and open your mind.

So, for this encounter to just…happen…in Houston, for me, was a sign from Our Lady that, yep – She’s on it!  And it was a nice visit.  She’s a great teacher.  She’s a stellar person.  She just talks WAAAAAY too fast for someone who wasn’t born deaf (me).  And she drinks too much Diet Coke.  She is ruining her hypothalamus (sp?).  Anywho.  I’m happy.

And, to top this no-reason for it trip, hubs came with me to Lulu in the Galleria and helped me pick out a couple of things.  Two super-sweet jackets and a pair of shorts.  YYYEEESSSSSSS!  Love them.  Will use them.

Lent.  Whatcha doin’ about it?  God made each and every one of us.  He knew us before our own mothers knew us.  Show him your love today, won’t you?

Peace.  I can’t wait for Mass tomorrow!

Ash Wednesday…

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today was great.  i woke up thinking about Lent and all that it holds – the opportunities to grow closer to God, to learn more about Him and our faith…the possibilities are endless.  in our family, we talk about what we are giving up, what we are doing affirmatively, etc.  For me, that includes no alcohol.  i will pray the Rosary more and more devoutly – sometimes i listen to my rosary app and it’s really soothing to me and my spirit.  but i realized during my run this morning that i really should pray it to honor Mary and for Her intentions.  of course, like a good Mother, She wants to know our intentions – She wants to know everything so She can help us.  so, what i’m saying is, i want to honor Her more in praying the rosary.  i want to go to Mass more during the week.  and, for my health, i plan to follow the way of eating that has best served me physically and physiologically – that is, for me, to fuel my morning runs, i don’t eat carbs until the evening.  until 5:00 p.m., i only eat food that God made – fruit, vegetables, salad, nuts, eggs, smoothies (okay, i got a little creative with His creations 🙂  The point it, it works for me.

i hope that anyone who reads this – Roman Catholic or otherwise – will try to have a Lenten season like no other.  i promise you, because i’ve been there, it is so worth it.  one day, no matter what you believe, you will see the face of God.  i want Him to be pleased with me and all that i have done in my life.  i want to attone for my sins.  i want to be like Mary.  i want to make God happy.  when your focus is changed to making Him happy, you will be amazed with the way things fall into place in your life.

anyone who reads my blog knows that life does not turn into a bed of roses; it surely does not.  but what does happen is this – you will feel the assuredness of our Lord Jesus.  when you place ALL your trust in Him, amazing things happen.  i love Lent so much because of what i just described – but, somehow during these 40-some-odd-days, your spirit will become strengthened and you know you do not walk this walk alone.  the relationships that are formed and fostered with God, Mary, and Joseph, and all the angels and saints, do not end at Easter – these relationships will continue forever, if you wish.

for me, there is no going back.  i am a certified slave of Jesus.

peace, y’all.  don’t forget, it’s never too late.  not sure how to start?  just start asking right now within your heart.  then get ready, y’all, cuz good things are gonna start blowing your mind!  maybe you’ll find yourself so peaceful in the midst of what would normally seem chaos – and indeed may be chaotic – but you will feel the peace of Our Lord Jesus within you.  and you won’t be rattled.  that’s just an example.  just ask with an open heart and then expect blessings.

peace.

too much…

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i am tired.  of a lot of things.  i’m mostly tired of our girls’ school saying no.  no, we won’t.  no, we can’t.  no, she doesn’t.  no, she can’t.  no, she isn’t.  i think the ‘no, we won’t’ is the one that bothers me the most.  when i see a child, especially one in need, i want to just give that kiddo whatever he needs.  get it.  it’s a kid, for crissakes.  just do it.  really?  we can’t?  we will not give anymore help this year that what we are giving right now.  (which is inadequate.)  just say, fail.  please, we really want you to be unsuccessful in your endeavors.  my mind is so tired, i really want to give up the fight.  on a thumbnail, here is my day yesterday, which, i’m pretty sure is adding to my sheer exhaustion:

wake up at 5:40, slice King Cake into 24 even slices.  hide two babies cuz the cake is so big.  get kids up, dressed, fed, to bus. home.  hubs.  help.  me, dentist 9:20 for what is supposed to be a “five minute wisdom tooth extraction.”  don’t EVER believe them when they say that.  it’s a friggin’ lie.  10:35 i’m dashing out of there to hubs office to get one signed contract & check for school for next year.  dash home so lady can take pictures of some crap in the pool house.  she lectures me to go to bed.  bite it, lady, i got things to do.  get same mini-van-slow-driving lady to follow me across the street to storage so she can take more pictures.  more lecture.  i finally lie, okay, i’ll go to bed.  really, she asks?  no, not really, but you keep asking me, so, yeah, i’ll lie, cuz if you are done here…well, i got shit to do.  done.  and done.  back to hubs office.  drop off mardi gras dress to one of my very favorite nieces.  go fill lortab in case pain hits.  (it never got so bad i needed it – thank You, Jesus).  Target.  girls’ school. drop off thingy.  lovely lady in office looks at me questionably and raises up pointer finger, “one?”  i just proceed to cry.  my cheek hurts.  the hole in my head hurts.  the hole in my palate where she shot me up and then later put stitches, really hurts.  my hair stinks.  sweet lady hugs me.  oh, baby, what’s wrong?  i just spilled the beans to her.  she, like the shining example of God’s love and especially of Mary, disappeared to a different room and came back with a Novena for me.  we talked more.  my car, still out there, was now in the way and i didn’t care.  go around me.  i left there feeling much better because finally, i could tell someone i could trust, “i just want God’s will; that’s IT.  WHATever it is.”  she nodded in agreement.  she walked me out.  “i love you, Miss Laura.”  “i love you too, baby, and i’m gonna be praying with you.”  God bless her.  i do love that lady.

i woke up today just not having the fight in me to convince anyone else of how phenomenal my two, born deaf, cochlear implanted, daughters are.  if they don’t want them + almost $30,000, i feel like we need to look elsewhere.  like my hubs said, ‘i’m not feeling the love.’  i’m just not.  i’m tired of pushing.  i’m tired of hearing the negativitiy.  no matter how great she does, there is some stinking caveat that accompanies her accomplishment, ‘well, that was an easy test.’ ‘well, we tore that book apart; she should have done well.’  and the cherry on the cake?  her grades were all elevated from the first quarter.  but still, they talk smack.

yes, i know God has my back.  i think He wants me to rest.  fine.  i want to rest, too.

my mouth hurts, my spirit hurts, my heart hurts.  i feel so disconnected.  i feel like the rug has gotten ripped out from under me.  i want to run.  far.  i’m so happy the kids are out of school next week.

just breathe…

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things that happened to me today – had a great telephone conversation with my beautiful son while i walked my basic 2.8 mile lap.  i was heavy-handed (+4lbs) and light-hearted.  he has decided to keep this sweet, precious, imperfect beagle he found in a raging storm last saturday in north louisiana.  in listening to him describe his week taking care of this sweet dog, i was awed by his compassion and thought process.  he has grown into a stellar young man who i am pretty sure makes God really happy.  you know, as mothers, we pray, we work, we guide, we teach by example, we do everything we can to ensure our children grow up and leave our arms and never forget they are in Our Father’s Arms…and Mary’s…and Joseph’s.  well, you get the picture.

anywho, it is a good day.  i didn’t run, just had the walk & talk and i rode one lap, too.  but i just needed a day off from that kind of thing.  i used to beat myself up over that, but not anymore.  listening to my body is a much healthier way i find…

another great thing that happened today is…i was serenaded in sam’s (a warehouse club) by a 4-year old girl on her birthday.  🙂  she walked up in line behind me with her mom, who was carrying a bag of shrimp (to fry i found out, in honor of sweet 4 year old’s b-day), and i let them cut, obviously, and this precious little angel struck up the longest conversation with me.  sweet.

quiet lull in south louiiana…cool, breezy days…mardi gras is coming, y’all!  i’m not such a huge fan…anymore.  i grew up on it, so i guess i got my fill.  if i had my way, i’d spend it in seaside, far away from the noise & over-indulgence.  the older i get the less it makes sense – the over-indulgence part, that is.  mardi gras – drink, eat, repeat.  a lot.  then Ash Wednesday comes & hopefully, we have given thought prior to the first day of Lent as to what we will be doing to fulfill our Lenten obligations.  i’m still thinking about what i intend to do.  i love Mass.  i truly crave being in the presence of Our Lord, so going to Mass more during the weeks of Lent is always a good thing.

anywho…start thinking, y’all!  God knows each and every hair on your head; the least we can do is honor Him and thank Him in any way that we can.

peace out.