I always thought the biggest ache of my life was losing my mom.  It was this tangible, internal ball of darkness.  I hated it.  But the pain subsided because I knew she went to Heaven.  Second to that was thinking I was losing the person I was so deeply in love with.  Lucky for me, I didn’t. 

Today, I took my three children to see Toy Story 3.  Toward the end, when Andy, practically all grown up, was saying good-bye to his mom in his newly vacated room, I lost it.  It was the biggest tug at my heart in so very long.  I sat right by my beautiful 17 year old son who has been, hands down, the best relationship, most lasting relationship I have ever had.  He made me a mother.  He was such a gift from God when I really didn’t think I deserved a gift.  Just the promise of that sweet little life in my stomach caused my life to do a one-eighty.  I’ve never been the same.  Thank God.  Thank You, God.  Luckily for me, my son and I have a great relationship.  Nothing is off limits.  I believe if it’s important enough for him to ask me about, I owe it to him to be honest.   He knows he can ask me anything and tell me anything.  I love being his parent and guiding him in ways my mom didn’t have the good fortune of being able to do.  I see God in my son’s life.  I see God in his eyes.  He is so far ahead of the curve it makes me exhuberant.  So, at this point in the movie, which I was totally not expecting, it’s Pixar, right?  My son tapped my leg, in a re-assuring way that just made my heart melt.  This sweet little boy…the first Toy Story, I took him to see it at Acadiana Mall, when they still had a movie theater!  The second one, at the now defunct Westwood on Congress, in Lafayette.  And, now, the third, we met at the Grand in Lafayette. 

I know my son is growing up and growing out.  I know he will go to college, too.  It’s a new beginning, I keep telling myself.  It’s a year away.  But, as a mom, I know how quickly these years have ticked by and I just want to do my best to relish in the time he is still a kid with some naivete (sp?) in his life. 

He’s sleeping out tonight.  I just called his number to check on him and find out final plans for the evening.  He didn’t answer the two times I rang him.  But, I didn’t really worry, because I know what kind of kid he is.  Sure enough, he called me back and told me he was swimming with his buddies and didn’t hear the phone.  I told him I loved that he was having fun with his friends and just wanted to check on him and make sure everything was okay and what were his plans for the evening. 

I have always believed that parents should be parents and kids can have friends at school.  I still believe this.  But, seeing what a wonderful young man I have been blessed with as a son, I delight in the prospect of being able to be friends with him as he grows up and out.  This mentality has paid off, apparently, because he has a gift of discernment that is only God-given.  He innately does good things.  No, he’s not an angel, but after the movie we saw today, I am choosing to think of what a better world mine is because of him.  I love that boy.


About southernrunningmom

Contact me like this: Via FaceBook - Mary Broussard, Certified Health Coach (feel free to private message me) or e-mail me - I am also on Twitter - MaryBob143. Instagram - Southern Running Mom...peace out. I keep my original profile details up because...well, that was my truth back then. Today, I'm much different. And busy. So, I'll update the About Me section very soon. Meanwhile, my tags would be: recovery, AA, 12 Steps, honesty, abuse, recognizing narcissism. Any who, thanks for reading this far. Mom with great husband & family...I totally love running, cooking, gardening...

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